Why did the chicken cross the road?



DR. PHIL:
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.




OPRAH :
Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.




GEORGE W. BUSH :
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.




COLIN POWELL :
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...




ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.




JOHN KERRY :
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.




NANCY GRACE :
That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.




PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.




MARTHA STEWART :
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.




DR SEUSS :
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.




ERNEST HEMINGWAY :
To die in the rain. Alone.




JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth?' That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.




GRANDPA :
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.




BARBARA WALTERS :
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.




JOHN LENNON :
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.





ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.




BILL GATES :
I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ........ reboot.




ALBERT EINSTEIN :
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?




BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?




AL GORE:
I invented the chicken!




COLONEL SANDERS:
Did I miss one?




DICK CHENEY :
Where's my gun?




AL SHARPTON:
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


i is proud to present Cause Effect, a series about real people making a difference. Learn more <http://im.live.com/Messenger/IM/MTV/?source=text_Cause_Effect>


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Share life as it happens with the new Windows Live. Share now! <http://www.windowslive.com/share.html?ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_122007>

TRBO:

For $350 I'll row you across the road and you can ask the chicken yourself!



Fish on...

Todd

Stam...nice.

Fish on...

Todd

I am not a chicken, nor have I ever been a chicken.

Thanks for listening,

Larry

Gary Coleman: whatchu lookin at Willis?

Because Elisha was calling him?

To show the 'possum it could be done?

Vince
to fish cum in the parking lot.

if you eat a chicken omlette, is that genocide???

If I had a get out of jail free card I would hit Nancy Grace over the head with a hammer.

It's funny how true some of those replies are to peoples actual character

Oprah and martha stewart. Both of those broads,and Rosie odonnnell the fat cow.,

Winterking:

I wish that the chicken would stay off of my side of the road.

Fish on...

Todd

Because he wanted to try and [censored] that armadilla!!!

It's a sad day when a chicken can't cross the road without being questioned! Next we'll be water boarding chickens.

Todd:
It is obvious that we don't have all the facts here to really undestand the situation. Has anyone asked the chicken if he really wanted to cross the road?

Fish on..

blue_jay - It's obvious the chicken is a liberal leftard and is only crossing the road because Air America comes in better over there.

Addicted - Who gives a sh!t about the chicken... have you guys gotten a load o' my wife!

Avid Angler - That ain't no chicken... it's Blades... and he's gay... beep!

Strike Zone - What chicken? Good luck.

Todd - That freakin' chicken wishes he could put on as many miles as I do in a day!

Merg - Looks like I'm gonna hafta teach that chicken how to pick up chicks!

Sol - Betcha I can drink more, smoke more, screw more, catch more fish and post more than that f%cking chicken ever thought of...


Disclaimer: The above post is intended purely as light-hearted fun. NO personal animosity, implied or otherwise is intended whatsoever.

4Salt:

After several years of walking on the Right side of the road, the chicken finally smarted up and headed across to the Left...

Timber:

Because the other side is "Simply the Best"...

Rvrfshr:

What road? Ting!

Parker:

'Cuz that's the side that all the guides I fish with walk on!

Aix sponsa:

Road? Well, if trees walk road yellow, then green there, game on...ducky!

Dave D:

I wasn't supposed to turn there?

Dan S.:

Anyone seen my rod on that side of the road? I can't find it on this side...

Gary Loomis:

To join the CCA!!

Smalma:

Which side of the road would you have the chicken walk on? He can't walk on both sides. In my limited experience, changing ocean conditions usually result in the chicken being on the other side of the road, but I'm willing to listen if anyone has any alternate explanations.

Fish on...

Todd

To take a crap in the sanikan at Morrison Park?

Fish4brains, just curious why you took that pic? lol