#458328 - 10/07/08 05:44 PM
Obituary from the London Times
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Registered: 10/13/00
Posts: 9013
Loc: everett
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An Obituary printed in the London Times........
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
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would the boy you were be proud of the man you are
Growing old ain't for wimps Lonnie Gane
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#458338 - 10/07/08 06:27 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Jerry Garcia]
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WINNER
Registered: 01/11/03
Posts: 10363
Loc: Olypen
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+1 Dammit Jerry, we're getting old.........
_________________________
Agendas kill truth. If it's a crop, plant it.
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#458348 - 10/07/08 07:17 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: ParaLeaks]
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Three Time Spawner
Registered: 11/01/06
Posts: 1557
Loc: Silverdale Wa
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Ouch, but so true in the world we live in today.
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Never leave a few fish for a lot of fish son.....you just might not find a lot of fish-----Theo
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#458375 - 10/07/08 09:02 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Brewer]
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River Nutrients
Registered: 01/13/07
Posts: 3359
Loc: Pasco Bulldog country
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Clothes hanger lashing's while trapped in the closet....made me the man I am today. Thanks Mom. Mf
_________________________
Born again with IRON MAIDEN!
"Go hard, today Can't worry the past, coz that yesterday". GO COUGS!!!
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#458518 - 10/08/08 10:19 AM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Jerry Garcia]
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WINNER
Registered: 01/11/03
Posts: 10363
Loc: Olypen
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There shoulda been a sign somewhere along the route that read.....You are now entering the era of "The Whiny Little Bastards.....No balls beyond this point." Hey, at least we all get to enjoy the fruits of our labor.
_________________________
Agendas kill truth. If it's a crop, plant it.
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#458567 - 10/08/08 02:36 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Magicfly]
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Spawner
Registered: 06/04/02
Posts: 937
Loc: Everwet
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Clothes hanger lashing's while trapped in the closet....made me the man I am today. Thanks Mom. Mf I'm sure there has to be an attorney around here who will help you sue for reparations..
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Present AKA Knuckledragger
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#458584 - 10/08/08 03:38 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Brewer]
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Spawner
Registered: 03/17/99
Posts: 774
Loc: Everett, WA USA
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"my mom was a sweetheart mother" I hope you didn't find a sweetheart wife just like her.
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"Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there." Will Rogers
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#458687 - 10/09/08 12:19 AM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Brewer]
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River Nutrients
Registered: 01/13/07
Posts: 3359
Loc: Pasco Bulldog country
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Thank god I wasn't the family bed wetter, he got the vacuum cleaner cord...worst screams I ever listened to....no officer, the neighbor must have over heard the TV set...... Mf
_________________________
Born again with IRON MAIDEN!
"Go hard, today Can't worry the past, coz that yesterday". GO COUGS!!!
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#459203 - 10/10/08 10:11 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: Brewer]
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River Nutrients
Registered: 01/13/07
Posts: 3359
Loc: Pasco Bulldog country
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Yep, True story.... Love you mom...RIP....Love Aaron Mf
_________________________
Born again with IRON MAIDEN!
"Go hard, today Can't worry the past, coz that yesterday". GO COUGS!!!
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#459215 - 10/10/08 10:42 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: ]
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Spawner
Registered: 06/04/02
Posts: 937
Loc: Everwet
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Hmmm anyone see an inverse pattern emerging here with regards to upbringing? This would explain KK & Toddbama... raised by lib parents, spare the rod and spoil the child school of thought. Look what it has wrought. Supreme arrogance and steadfast belief in their opinions being the only possible correct ones. And everyone but themselves must be dismissed as stupid or insane.
Edited by nookie dreamin' (10/10/08 10:43 PM)
_________________________
Present AKA Knuckledragger
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#459218 - 10/10/08 10:50 PM
Re: Obituary from the London Times
[Re: ]
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River Nutrients
Registered: 01/13/07
Posts: 3359
Loc: Pasco Bulldog country
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After the beating's subsided....mother held a steak knife to my throat with Brewer present....(if memory serves me correct, listening to Red Barchetta playing, down stairs)
Looking mother eye to eye, begging her to stick me...she returned the steak knife back to the drawer...
Mf
_________________________
Born again with IRON MAIDEN!
"Go hard, today Can't worry the past, coz that yesterday". GO COUGS!!!
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