Investment tips for 2009

For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next
expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor
and make some BIG bucks.

Watch for these consolidations in 2009:

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller
Brush, and W R. Grace Co. Will merge and become:
Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2.) PolygramRecords, Warner Bros., and ZestaCrackers join
forces and become:
Poly, Warner Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become:
MMMGood.

4. ZippoManufacturing, AudiMotors, Dofasco, and Dakota
Mining will merge and become:
ZipAudiDoDa .

5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and
become:
FedUP.

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will
become:
Fairwell Honeychild

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become:
PouponPants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of
Women will become:
Knott NOW!

And finally...

9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith &Wesson will
merge under the new name:
TittyTittyBangBang