Courtsey of Fred Evans...


> > > Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
> > >
> > > GEORGE W BUSH
> > > We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just
want
> to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The
chicken
> is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground here.
And frankly,
I am sick and tired of the chicken.
> > >
> > > COLIN POWELL
> > > Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite
image of the chicken crossing the road.
> > >
> > > HANS BLIX
> > > We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet
been
> > > allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
> > >
> > > MOHAMMED ALDOURI (Iraq Ambassador)
> > > The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete
fabrication.We
> > > do not even have a chicken.
> > >
> > > RALPH NADER
> > > The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been
polluted by
> > > unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the
unspoiled
> > > habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the
wheels of a
> > > gas-guzzling SUV.
> > >
> > > PAT BUCHANAN
> > > To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American.
> > >
> > > RUSH LIMBAUGH
> > > I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was
> > > getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that
somebody out
> there is already forming a support group to help chickens with
> crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more
of this can real
> > > Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax
dollars.
And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the
> > > government took from you to build a road for chickens to cross.
> > >
> > > MARTHA STEWART
> > > No-one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I
had a
> > > standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the
price
> > > dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider
information.
> > >
> > > JERRY FALWELL
> > > Because the chicken was gay---isn't it obvious? Can't you people
see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going
to the
> 'other side'. That's what they call it the other side. Yes, my
friends,
> that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become
gay too.
> I say we Boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination
that
> the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like
"the
> > > other side".
> > >
> > > DR SEUSS
> > > Did the chicken cross the road?
> > > Did he cross it with a toad?
> > > Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
> > > but why it crossed I've not been told.
> > >
> > > ERNEST HEMINGWAY
> > > To die in the rain. Alone.
> > >
> > > MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
> > > I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
> > > without having their motives called into question.
> > >
> > > GRANDPA
> > > In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody
> > > told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
> > >
> > > BARBARA WALTERS
> > > Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to
the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of
how it
> > > experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish
its
> > > life long dream of crossing the road.
> > >
> > > JOHN LENNON
> > > Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in
> > > peace.
> > >
> > > ARISTOTLE
> > > It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
> > >
> > > KARL MARX
> > > It was an historic inevitability.
> > >
> > > RONALD REAGAN
> > > What chicken?
> > >
> > > CAPTAIN KIRK
> > > To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
> > >
> > > SIGMUND FREUD
> > > The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the
> road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
> > >
> > > BILL GATES
> > > I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only cross
roads,
> but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
> > > checkbook, -and internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken.
> > >
> > > ALBERT EINSTEIN
> > > Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath
> the chicken?
> > >
> > > BILL CLINTON
> > > I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your
definition
> of chicken?
> > >
> > > DR. PHIL
> > > He crossed with eyes wide open.
> > >
> > > THE BIBLE
> > > And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken THOU
SHALT
> > > CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road, and there
was
> > > much rejoicing.
> > >
> > > COLONEL SANDERS
> > > Did I miss one?
> > >
> > > THE FRENCH
> > > To Surrender?

:p

Can we get a few more >>>>>>>>>>>>>?

Somebody was at bored.com today!!!



Thats a real site. I dont know if thats where he saw this, but its there along with some other really funny stuff.

Why did the chicken cross the road???

To show the opossum it could be done…

hahahahahaha

Why did the chicken cross the road??

Because there was a guard rail and no turn out on the river ride of the road

Why did the chicken cross the road??

Because there was a guard rail and no turn out on the river ride of the road

What a bunch of "Turkeys"!

Why did the chicken cross the road?? . . . it's just like everything else. . .because he wanted to!!

Cowlitzfisherman

Gary Locke should be on that list. He would set up a chicken committee to examine the chicken's actions. After several years the committee would have no conclusions except that it's a complicated subject that requires more studies. And because the chicken crossed a public roadway we would need a special chicken gas tax to fund future studies and "chicken Xing" road signs.

Yes! Then Tim Eyeman can circulate an initiative petition to limit the chicken license to $30 and require a 2/3 majority for future increases in all those chicken [Bleeeeep!] taxes

Judge Boldt's ruling on road crossings:

Sport and commercial chickens are entitled to 50% of the crossings, Native chickens are entitled to the other 50%.

Of course the sport chickens will have to purchase a crossing license and punch cards to record where and when they cross. They'll make up a big thick reg book with special rules for westside roads and eastside roads and impose crossing seasons.

Penalty for illegal crossing - loss of license and drumsticks.

The chicken crossed the road to join the other chickens at the Washington Trout Auction

When the chicken reported the road crossing to the members of his favorite bulletin board, he was saddened to find out he in fact had actually crossed the road wrong. He was told countless times the correct way to cross the road, and called an idoit for crossing in an inappropriate manner in the first place..... Eventually a poll was started to see how many people thought the chicken was stupid for the method he used to cross the road. The thread was shortly thereafter locked by the moderators in an effort to save the chicken from any further roasting...

Sorry, I couldn't resist

so true, elkrun....so true

elkrun, I laughed so hard I hurt and the wife is calling the shrink. The road crossing post had Rush LIMBAUGH down pat. but then Rush has the left down pat. tom

Are you sure those were chickens and not weasals?