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#355707 - 05/31/07 10:56 AM Raising Girls
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
Nothing can prepare a guy for raising daughters. I picked my 7 year old up from school yesterday and while driving home she says, "Daddy, I like this song." It was ZZ Top's, Pearl Necklace. Is that fuc%ed-up or what? Irrespective of the fact she is oblivious to the meaning of the lyrics, worlds colide.

Last weekend my wife tells me, "The girls have some friends coming over," as she heads out to run some erands. Within 30 minutes there are 5 pre-puebescent little girls running around, each one trying to dominate and control the others. Ugly. All the moms want to be "friends" with these wrecks instead of laying down the law and it shows. No disipline whatsoever.

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#355712 - 05/31/07 11:14 AM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
Snake Pliskin Offline
Bead

Registered: 02/13/03
Posts: 1202
Loc: Duvall
Want more fun? Try raising step-daughters. Done it twice, sets of two. I was a bank machine, chauffeur, homework helper, but if I tried to discipline............I was out of line.

And when they turn 14? They go through a moody, dark year and you're evil.

My real daughter, now 25, is bright, funny and a know-it-all. When we get together she will say, "Dad, you should......." or "Dad, you need.....". So, now when I see her, I tell her she only gets 3 "dad, you shoulds" per day.

Sol, your daughter is 7? Your drinking days are just starting.......
_________________________
Bless our troops.

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#355716 - 05/31/07 11:38 AM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Snake Pliskin]
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
I have two, 7 and 9. I love them to death, but mutherphucker PALEASE!!!!!!!! They view life so differently than males I can't relate. Life is nothing more than princess parties and play dates. Money is free, mom washes their clothes and cleaning their rooms is asking to much.

BTW: I believe I've got the drinking problem licked. I drink beer on the weekends only. The days of drinking hard liquor 5 days a week to the tune of 2 gallons a month are over for me. I don't miss it either.

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#355758 - 05/31/07 01:13 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
Irie Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 11/26/06
Posts: 4317
Loc: South Sound
My daughter turn six tomorrow.
So far so good. I get to look down my nose at other people's spoiled brats. As far as kids go is my job is to raise her into a level headed responsible adult and thats it.

Sol--Congrats on licking the liquor.

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#355761 - 05/31/07 01:19 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
Chuck E Offline
Three Time Spawner

Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 1832
Loc: Kitsap Peninsula
My closest friend of over 30 years died 5 years ago leaving two teenage girls which I've become close to as a surrogate uncle. I figured no problem as I've raised two good sons that are adults now and have numerous nieces.
Wow - I had no clue about girls at all. My buddy used to bitch about being in a house of all women and I used to dog him for whining. Where ever you are, my brother, forgive me for I knew not what I was dogging about. These two are real Princesses.
I will give the two ladies this though-whenever there is grubby work to be done, they are there. We spent last Saturday repacking bearings on the 18 yr. olds sailboat trailer prior to launching it for the summer. She dug right in and was greasy handed when we were done.
Next job for me - chaperone at the all night graduation party. I hope I can stay awake.

Good luck, Sol. I know some of your pain with the young ladies.
_________________________
"I didn't care what she didn't 'low--I would boogie-woogie anyhow" John Lee Hooker

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#355765 - 05/31/07 01:26 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
Salmo g. Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 03/08/99
Posts: 13468
Sol,

I had two girls. I can only think of two downsides in retrospect. I wanted a son so I'd have an excuse to buy and build the huge electric train set I never had as a kid. And second, neither of them has taken much interest in fishing, altho they seem quite pleased at my interest.

They had plenty of play dates, but zero princess parties, and money wasn't on the menu. My girls learned to ID any fish I brought home and tossed in the kitchen sink. They learned to name each fin, the gills, maxillary, pre-max, and got to poke the eyes with their fingers. Maybe that's why they're both natural science majors instead of social science.

Your girls can be a lot of fun. Look for the entertainment value.

When my girls were in high school, we had coed sleepovers. We knew where everyone was, and who they were with. It worked out too well. I don't believe in curfews, but my ex-wife had some issues. We cut a deal with the kids that if they weren't gonna' be home by midnight, they had to call in, tell us where they were, who they were with, where they were going (ya know they're going somewhere else as soon as they hang up), and what time they would be home. That worked pretty well. No way was I gonna' stay up half the night waiting for kids to come home. I mighta' had to get up early to go fishing.

Forget about the cleaning the room issue. Make your life easier. Let them have their rooms as their own domain. Let 'em keep it how they want it. Serious. You can always renovate when they grow up and move out. I told my girls that if I had to come in their rooms for any maintenance or whatever, I expected to be able to walk on the floor, or whatever they had on it - it's their risk, not mine.

Let me introduce you to the "box." And you can introduce it to your angels. They can drop their stuff wherever in the house they like, but if it's not in their room, and is instead in the main family part of the house, it better not be there when they go to bed. Any crap left out at night, instead of tripping over it, I put it in the "box." The box may be emptied on Monday and Thurday nights only. If their favorite, or all their shoes, or whatever ended up in the box - well, that's tough sh!t; they shouldn't leave it out. Within two weeks, I never had to deal with kid crap strewn all over the house ever again. Their own rooms were nightmares, however, under the rules of problem ownership, that wasn't my problem.

Kids can be fun, if you let it be.

Anything for a bro'.

Sincerely,

Salmo g.

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#355771 - 05/31/07 01:41 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Chuck E]
laterun Offline
Repeat Spawner

Registered: 10/09/04
Posts: 1016
Loc: Napavine,Washington
Sol, having raised three daughters and one son,give me the boy anytime. The son was happy to play with his buddies,eat what was cooked,wear what was bought for him,do his chores,clean his room,keep his grades up,and do it all without whining. He could talk to you without crying and could give a sh"t if his buddies forgot to call back or didn't agree with him.
Now the "drama" queens. Where do I start? You have my sympathy as they get older. By the time they are 14, you will be the dumbest,cruelest,most out of touch and ignorant person on the planet. Only your wife will be held in less favor than you. The only good thing to come out of it was the times after they turned 19 that all of them came to me,appologied and questioned as to how I kept from throwing then out for being such bitches. We now have the best possible relationships I could hope for in friends. Good Luck. It does get better.

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#355776 - 05/31/07 01:59 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: laterun]
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
You know what really pisses me off? When I hear, "I'm bored," from either of them. We live on the waterfront, have an acre of freshly cut grass, 10,000 SF of practicaly level asphalt, more movies, toys, bikes and pets than should be allowed by law, and all our neighbors have kids the same age, yet they are constantly "bored." Give me a fuc%ing break!

I can hardly wait until they're teenagers and I come home to the whole lot of them on the rag, mom included.

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#355782 - 05/31/07 02:07 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
nookie dreamin' Offline
Spawner

Registered: 06/04/02
Posts: 937
Loc: Everwet
Hang tough Sol, lesser men than you have survived raising girls.
Just remember that one day they will grow up, get married and be some other poor guy's problem. Then there's always the universal parental curse "I hope when you do have your own children, they are JUST LIKE YOU"!
_________________________
Present
AKA Knuckledragger

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#355784 - 05/31/07 02:18 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
Dan S. Offline
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.

Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 16958
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
 Quote:
I can hardly wait until they're teenagers and I come home to the whole lot of them on the rag, mom included.


Yer doomed.
_________________________
She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell.
I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.

Bon Scott - Shot Down in Flames

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#355785 - 05/31/07 02:19 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: nookie dreamin']
Sky-Guy Offline
The Tide changed

Registered: 08/31/00
Posts: 7083
Loc: Everett
My two girls are almost 7 and 2.
As for the i'm bored thing. I translate that into "Daddy, I want your attention, lets go do something together" So go and take them to Dairy Queen, or take a walk at a park, or take them shopping. Get on their level. Most of the time they just need a little reminder of what they can do around the house, one of their hobbies, and off they go.

I say, force them to help you in the yard and with housework.
Teach them how things work and how to fix things...and how to think critically. Love them and listen.

Don't let them become like my step-brother's kids, who call the mexicans working in their yard "Slaves" while they sit and talk about how bored they are.
That type of attitude drives me flippin nuts.

_________________________
You know something bad is going to happen when you hear..."Hey, hold my beer and watch this"

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#355787 - 05/31/07 02:21 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: nookie dreamin']
Chuck E Offline
Three Time Spawner

Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 1832
Loc: Kitsap Peninsula
When my sons said they were bored, I put them to work. They figured it out fairly quickly and never said that to me any longer. When they became teenagers and would whine about something, I just told them that their whining was my goal, music to my ears, fewer sounds were sweeter than their whining and meant that my job as a parent was going well.
_________________________
"I didn't care what she didn't 'low--I would boogie-woogie anyhow" John Lee Hooker

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#355800 - 05/31/07 03:17 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Chuck E]
B-RUN STEELY Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 3233
Loc: IDAHO
Wow, what a read. I think I saw my own family in several ofv these posts. I have a daughter thats 23, and one thats 15. The one thats 23 always lived with her mom, and was never a problem. The one thats 15 however.. what a mouth on that chick.

I think the thing that bothers me most is that she totally disregards anything I say and re-directs any and everything to "mom".. In fact, she will say " I'm not talking to you am I ?? I was talking to mom". She will run my wife ragged. From about age 10 to present, she will stand upsatirs and yell "MOM" 30 or 40 times without bothering to come downstairs and find her. All she wants is to ask a question, but she wants my wife to jump to it and come to her. She is in control at all times in this house. She will not lift a finger to help with anything, yet demands everything. My son is similar ( sheltered by his momma.. she does everything for him.. just graduated high school and is headed to colledge and has zero idea of how to do anything for himself) I have tried over the years to straighten this train wreck out but then "I'm the BAD guy" or I am being " Negative"...

I guess the part that bothers me most is I remember how nice they used to be before they were teenagers
_________________________
Clearwater/Salmon Super Freak

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#355804 - 05/31/07 03:55 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Salmo g.]
The Moderator Offline
The Chosen One

Registered: 02/09/00
Posts: 13942
Loc: Tuleville
 Originally Posted By: Salmo g.

Let me introduce you to the "box."


Ok, the "box" kicks ass!

How old were your kids when you introduced them to the "box"?

_________________________
Tule King Paker

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#355807 - 05/31/07 04:17 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: ]
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
Plus you seem happy to live in a fuc%ing pig stye. What's that leave to bitch about?

When all this shi% blew up back in December I was deamed "the asshole they couldn't live with anymore." My requests to clean crap up just got met with statements like, "if we do as you ask you just up the bet by asking for more." Well, ya, because the shi% they just picked-up in the hallway was deposited on the rec room floor instead of being put away. So I'd say "clean that up." Multiply that by 3 (my wife is almost as bad as the kids) and pretty much everything that came out of my mouth was "negitive." And since there's three of them and one of me, I'm the one with the "personality problem."

The box idea sounds like it is worth trying.


Edited by Sol (05/31/07 04:18 PM)

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#355812 - 05/31/07 04:38 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: ]
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
I went through 2 lint rollers to clean the last coat that got left in that kennel you call a living room.

Don't take me too seriously, bro, I love ya.

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#355817 - 05/31/07 04:56 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: ]
Snake Pliskin Offline
Bead

Registered: 02/13/03
Posts: 1202
Loc: Duvall
Sol, you're not going to change your girls and your wife now or in the future, so pick your battles. To me, it looks like you have a good reason to be gone more from home(especially when they are all on their monthly cycle) and ........................GO FISHING!

Sorry about the drinking comment. Everybody has a their own level of moderation. If drinking beer only on weekends works for you, then good. I had a buddy who used to enjoy smoking cigars with me, but he worked his way up to 4 or 5 a day, so had to quit cold turkey. He simply couldn't find his level of moderation. I just enjoy a cigar every 3 or 4 days AND a drink EVERY day. That's my level of moderation.

Memo to Stam: My dog sheds too. Real dogs do.
_________________________
Bless our troops.

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#355821 - 05/31/07 05:08 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: ]
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
Don't do it John. Get yourself a karate monkey and grow a big plot of weed instead.

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#355826 - 05/31/07 05:28 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: Sol]
stlhead Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 03/08/99
Posts: 6732
No daughters here but try growing up with two sisters, only one bathroom, one phone and one TV. In fact one morning before High School I woke up to the usual "fight over the bathroom" only it was between the two sisters. My mom gets up, slaps me and goes back to bed. My sisters, seeing me get whacked for no reason, stopped fighting so I guess it was effective.
_________________________
"You learn more from losing than you do from winning." Lou Pinella

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#355830 - 05/31/07 05:32 PM Re: Raising Girls [Re: stlhead]
Dan S. Offline
It all boils down to this - I'm right, everyone else is wrong, and anyone who disputes this is clearly a dumbfuck.

Registered: 03/07/99
Posts: 16958
Loc: SE Olympia, WA
Did I just hear "big plot of weed" ?

C'mon.........don't fool around.

Where is it?

_________________________
She was standin' alone over by the juke box, like she'd something to sell.
I said "baby, what's the goin' price?" She told me to go to hell.

Bon Scott - Shot Down in Flames

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