PP gold has been struck over here in the catbox !
Lawyers and libel over Bigfoot....
Doesn't seem like anything a showdown at the trailer park couldn't fix....
Please don't delete any of this, mods.... it's one
for the ages!
Lawyers....
I've been withholding the following information a bit, because most people aren’t mentally or spiritually ready to handle what I’m about to share….but….
I have obtained 100% proof that evil shenanigans have occurred from an "agency" inside source of mine that I've code named “Deep Throat Snowden”. Agent Snowden secretly passed onto me what is now publicly known as the “Orange Crop Report”. In this infamous report, it’s shown that there was a Bigfoot family group lost in the Benghazi complex during the whole 911 anniversary attack. This group was known within the "community" as the "Henderson Family" and was led by our #1 agent "Mr. Harry" with whom we sadly lost to scat inhalation. The report reveals that the Benghazi complex was just a front to help stop a much more sinister master plot from ending our very existence. I guess the evil Koch brothers had sent Darth Beiber & his minion of Bugs to find and steal all of Iraq's WMD's & the Arc of the Covenant to unleash on all of humanity. And Ohio. So the real purpose of the Benghazi location was to act as a Stargate teleport site with active MiB agents (the Henderson Family and Jaden Smith) to defend and prevent this plot from happening and ending our very civilized existence. And Ohio. Sadly, Agent Jaden was the only MiB agent to make it out alive.
So anyway, the Orange Crop report also reveals that the real reason why the Henderson group couldn't be evacuated and saved, was that our Halliburton Co. made Special Forces cloaking device went on the fritz and they couldn't inter-dimensionally communicate with each other. The 3 am phone call was never received! Something about needing an Apple style charger and only having a micro-USB style available (blame the sequester cuts). This caused the Holo-Deck to malfunction during teleport file transfer and that prevented the rescue team from entering the Matrix at the Quilcene Stargate site. By the time our special forces team consisting of Moochelle (aka Super Butt), Ventura (aka Sexual Tee-rano-sarus Rex), Swift (aka No Talent Ass Clown), Perry (aka Power Tits) and Hawking (the Professor X of this daring super team) got the problem resolved, it was too late to deploy Operation "Wango Tango" by swallowing the red pill; connecting the Apple style comms charger; uploading the teleport transfer file and entering the Matrix at the Quilcene Stargate site to extract the Henderson Group from the Stargate Benghazi site. What a complex and unfortunate tragedy all around.
Now it’s up to Lawyers Issa and Gowdy (both Pod People) to find and expose the truth! That lying bitch Susan Rice, who happens to be a Lizard Person and we all know that Pod's and Lizard's have been in a 32 light year long war and hate each other - went on TV and blamed it on the Pam and Tommy video. Can you believe that chit?!? I mean, who in their right mind is going to believe it’s all to be blamed on a very simple man that can honk a boat horn with his dick? That’s a BS excuse and all lies!!!!!
So we all saw Cankles Clinton (leader of the lizard people) try to defend “itself” from these slime Pod People lawyers up on the hill by shouting “At this point, what difference does it make!?!”. Well, let me tell you Mrs. Clinton - it makes a HUGE difference! You just can't charge a Halliburton Co. cloaking device with a mini-USB style charger. Simply put, we need to enact more comprehensive & common sense Cloaking Device control to prevent tragedies like this from ever happening again!
Washington is broken folks and it’s up to us to fix it and there is only one man that’s up to the task. Elect Cruz in 2016!