Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor
peered over the fence.

Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was doing, He
politely asked, "What are you up to there, Nancy?"

"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up,
And I've just buried him.

The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a
goldfish isn't it?'

Nancy patted down the last heap of earth then replied,

"That's because he's inside your phucking cat."

good one

Johnny shows up Sat nite to pickup Betty for the prom and her dad answers the door, "So Johnny, where you kids off too?" Sir, we're going to dinner first then to the dance" Father asks, "Are you going to screw tonight?" Johnny, red in the face replies "Sir?" Father answers, "Screw, Betty loves to screw, she would screw all night if we didn't make her come home by 11:00, so you kids have a great time" Betty comes down and they leave. 20 mins later Betty comes running back through the door, "DAD! IT'S CALLED THE TWIST, NOT THE THE SCREW, THE TWIST!".