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#176801 - 07/13/06 12:54 PM Cleaning up my act
B-RUN STEELY Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 3233
Loc: IDAHO
Since I had to rant on Unions ( which actually do have the SUCK knob turned up full blast) I have decided that maybe I should modify my people skills somewhat. We could all learn from this... Or not

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America,
Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred
to
as "HILLBILLIES."
You must now refer to us as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

And furthermore ....

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR
OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

5. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."

6. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY
INCONVENIENCED"

7. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."

8. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

9. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."

10. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY
SUPERIOR."

11. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID
GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL
RELATIONSHIPS."

6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY
HORIZONTAL."

7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of
RECTAL-CRANIAL
INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."

9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."

10. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR
CLEAVAGE
_________________________
Clearwater/Salmon Super Freak

Top
#176802 - 07/13/06 01:20 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
Does your "hate mail" box fill up like mine after a post like this? I've had people call me everything from a jackass to the Anti-Christ.

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#176803 - 07/13/06 01:22 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
silverkiller Offline
Juvenille at Sea

Registered: 06/07/05
Posts: 229
Loc: enumclaw
how does this have to do with fishing?? iam just wondering but i thought that this forum was for fishing topics

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#176804 - 07/13/06 01:27 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
larryb Offline
The Rainman

Registered: 03/05/01
Posts: 2314
Loc: elma washington
no this board is about life
_________________________
don't push the river it flows by itself
Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
FREE PARKER DEATH TO RATS

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#176805 - 07/13/06 01:30 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
silverkiller Offline
Juvenille at Sea

Registered: 06/07/05
Posts: 229
Loc: enumclaw
fishing is life

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#176806 - 07/13/06 01:37 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
11. A guy that sets the hook to soon on a plug rod isn't "IMPATIENT"- He's got "STAMPALSY."

There, it's now "topically related" to fishing. smile

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#176807 - 07/13/06 01:55 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
B-RUN STEELY Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 3233
Loc: IDAHO
12. A guy who is forever hooking himself up with sweet boat rides on great rivers isn't a " BOAT WHORE" He is "FLOATATIONALLY BRILLANT" wink
_________________________
Clearwater/Salmon Super Freak

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#176808 - 07/13/06 02:01 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
13. A guy who pukes fishing out of Westport isn't "SEA SICK"- He's a "GUNNAL FUNNEL." laugh

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#176809 - 07/13/06 02:13 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
Mr.Twister Offline
Spawner

Registered: 10/15/03
Posts: 719
Loc: Olympia
If she is "Horizontally accessible", she is a "Sol-mate"....

I know...bad cop, no donut.
_________________________
"I'm old and tough, dirty and rough" -Barnacle Bill the sailor

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#176810 - 07/13/06 02:25 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
fishhead5 Offline
Repeat Spawner

Registered: 09/06/00
Posts: 1083
Loc: Shelton
rofl rofl
_________________________
Fishhead5

It is not illegal to deplete a fishery by management.

They need to limit Democrats to two terms, one in office, and one in prison.

Top
#176811 - 07/13/06 02:25 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
And if your calf cramps up with your prostate when you climax??????????????

It sucks growing old. frown

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#176813 - 07/14/06 10:50 AM Re: Cleaning up my act
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
I figured my last post might get this thing moved to the "obscure" board. smile

Top
#176814 - 07/14/06 11:23 AM Re: Cleaning up my act
Dave Vedder Offline
Reverend Tarpones

Registered: 10/09/02
Posts: 8379
Loc: West Duvall
Sol: I think you may find relief if you try having sex with a partner. No, blow up dolls do not count.

Of course I'm so old I cant remember sex. Hell I don't even think about it more than 200 times a day.
_________________________
No huevos no pollo.

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#176815 - 07/14/06 02:58 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
Sol Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 7477
Loc: Poulsbo
Quote:
Sol: I think you may find relief if you try having sex with a partner.
I tell my wife the same thing about midway through intercourse.

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#176816 - 07/14/06 05:28 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
B-RUN STEELY Offline
River Nutrients

Registered: 02/08/00
Posts: 3233
Loc: IDAHO
rofl

Funny how the same Chit happens to guys around the world.

THERE WAS A DAY WHE NO MATTER HOW STINKIE BAD !! I was, I would be getting laid "and" special side dishes !!! Now its more about ass kissing and house cleaning
_________________________
Clearwater/Salmon Super Freak

Top
#176817 - 07/17/06 05:16 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
fishhead5 Offline
Repeat Spawner

Registered: 09/06/00
Posts: 1083
Loc: Shelton
Quote:
Originally posted by B-RUN STEELY:
Now its more about ass kissing and house cleaning
Who's doing which now??
_________________________
Fishhead5

It is not illegal to deplete a fishery by management.

They need to limit Democrats to two terms, one in office, and one in prison.

Top
#176818 - 07/18/06 02:35 PM Re: Cleaning up my act
fishhead5 Offline
Repeat Spawner

Registered: 09/06/00
Posts: 1083
Loc: Shelton
Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
_________________________
Fishhead5

It is not illegal to deplete a fishery by management.

They need to limit Democrats to two terms, one in office, and one in prison.

Top

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