when your wife ask you where her good scissors are and the 1st place you look is your bait box.
you know your a steelheader when your wife yells at you to get back on the road when you swerve off it trying to get a glimpse of the river as you drive by.
When all your boats are newer than your truck...........and you are still looking for another boat.
when the guides ask you how the fishin was yesterday.
You have a power worm dangling from your rear view mirror because you think it makes a good air freshener.
Your wedding party had to tie tin cans to the back of your bass boat.
You call your boat "sweetheart" and your wife "skeeter".
Your local tackle shop has your credit card number on file.
You keep a ugly stick by your favorite chair to change the TV channels with.
You name your black lab "Mercury" and your cat "Evinrude".
Bass Pro Shop has a private line just for you.
You have your name painted on a parking space at the launch ramp.
You have a photo of your 40 lb. chinook on your desk at work instead of your family.
You think MEGABYTES means a great day fishing.
You send your kid off to the first day of school with his shoes tied in a palomar knot.
You think there are four seasons--Pre-spawn, Spawn, Post Spawn and Hunting.
Your $30,000 boat's trailer needs new tires so you just "borrow" the ones off your house.
You trade your wife's van for a smaller vehicle so your boat will fit in the garage.
Your kids know it's Saturday---Because the boats gone,
When dressing up means you put on your newest fishing hat.
When your wife stores her jewelry in a 3 tray tackle box.
When your new living room furniture, is your old boat seats.
When your wall hangings are fishing poles.
When your work boots are falling apart and your hip boots are brand new.
When your kids can tie hooks before they can tie their shoes.
When you have an old reel for a paper weight.
When getting wood for the winter, means stocking up on wood chips for your smoker.
When you read your kids a bed time story out of one of your fishing magazines.
When your wifes recipe box is full of brine mixes
When your fridge has more salmon eggs in it than food
When all the cats in the neighborhood follow your rig home.
when your fingernails are always a nice shade of pink.
when anyone other than you hops in your car and starts to gag, and you can't smell a thing.
when the garbage man puts a respirator on to take the lid off your trash can.
when you knock your wife out of bed setting the hook on a "sleepy-time" chromer.
when you come back to work after being sick for a few days, and everyone says "How's the fishing?"
When your boat is worth more than your house (and the boat is paid for, but the house isn't)
You tell a non-fishing friend about your last trip. "I was smokin em and had two crackers with me that couldn't hookup anything to cook all day" You never hear from you friend again as he now thinks your hooked on drugs and running around with "the wrong crowd".
When the rod rack in your office is bigger than some stores!
When your wife gets the rod you've been wanting ssssoooo badly for Christmas..... from you!
When the rod (gun) rack in the canopy always has a rod or two in it "just in case".
When there are burlap sacks in the truck behind the seat, in the "emergency" box, in the wifes car, and in every storage area in the boat.
When the wife says, "NO! The boat is not coming with us!"
When every room in the house has a couple of rod in the corner, completed or not.
When the decor of every room in the house except the daughters, has some kind of fish theme.
The neighbors, after four years, are selling thier house, possibly due to the weekend O'dark thirty diesel alarm clock.
When certain flavors of smelly jelly go better with certain sandwichs.
You can navigate rivers in the dark, but have to ask your wife how to get to the kid's school.
You have a favorite position for 'relieving' yourself while on a boat.
When the menu at your house sounds like a scene from Forest Gump (Fried Salmon, Baked Salmon, Salmon Stirfry, Cocunut Salmon...)
You sleep more on your boat than in your bed.
For a christmas list you hand your wife the Cabela's or Bass Pro catalogue and say, "That should cover it."
Your photo album has more pictures of fish than people.
When you thumb the spool on your dog's retractable leash.
when your vacuum cleaner gets clogged up with mono fishing line.
when you have to stop at every bridge on the road to look in the water.
When you go to bed at night you think of fishing.
When you wake up in the morning and you are still thinking about fishing.
When your friends don't want to come to your house for dinner because they know what's being served every time.
When a couple of skeins of salmon eggs in a fish caught excites you more than anything else.
The river levels are on your speed dial
When you can't vacation without your favorite fishing rod and reel.
When you have blood spots on the window above the kitchen sink.
When you refer to your “baby” your referring to your boat.
When you get home and the wife starts clearing the counter, sets out a spoon and fillet knife, grabs a couple plastic grocery bags, then gets the tilla vacuum packer out.
When you cant get out of a tackle store without dropping $100.
When Monday comes and all the office folk ask, “So, did you bring us some smoked fish?”
When your in the tackle store and another customer ask if you know where something is and you say aisle 6, 15th peg from the left end and 4th hook up from the floor.
When you ask Les Schwab if he can retread your waders
You actually know what salmon eggs taste like
Your wife has the "fishing widows" website on her favorites
You actually use a stop watch when launching and retreiving your boat
You show up at your parents and Mom ask "is everything OK with the family, where is the boat?"
Your kid ask for a fishing rod for christmas so he can spend more time with you.
You have a boat plug on your key chain
You actually know the aluminum thickness on both the bottom and side of your boat, along with aluminum grades.
the first requirement in a new truck is class of trailer hitch it comes with.
You have a tide book in your wallet
The game warden knows how many punches you have on your tag at any time
you know where every rock in a river is located, but you dont notice the grass in your yard is 2 feet tall
you have more rods in the garage then underwear in your dresser
You wake up early in the AM, make some toast and realize you've just spread freshly cured salmon eggs on your breakfast. Now, if you are a redneck you just slap on another piece of bread, call it a sandwich and head out the door