Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is a impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.

What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

Funny how that works huh?

I really get a chuckle out of this one

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

looks like the troops are in lock step this morning....You guys have got it nailed .. Good job.

Thanks Grandpa

Hey where is the rest of your cult this morning

His life is miserable and he is looking for someone to blame. Must not believe in mirrors or his cult avoids them.

We work for a living.....

Here's an empirical definition of hypocrisy: The owner of an SUV with a Kerry bumper sticker letting his smaller, more environmentally friendly and fuel efficient car run unattended to "warm up" on a chilly, foggy morning... saw that while walking the springer this morning. That's worth at least a chuckle in liberal old Port Townsend.

Keith

You can get a ticket for that in Germany. In fact, you're supposed to kill the engine even while sitting at RR crossings waiting for a train to pass, if I recall correctly.

OK,

As a die hard conservative Christian, I gotta admit that thing is really well done. I got lots of good chuckles.

Just remember that whether or not people who call themselves Chrisians act like idiots, Jesus still loves you