When I got married, my freinds attacked my house and really messed it up. Its been ten years and I still find confetti from the boxes and boxes of it they dumped through out my house. I promised to get back at them, and finally got to get one of them good last year. He was living in a lake front cabin that wasn't up to county code. I copied a non-compliance order from the county with everything from septic violations and rodent infestation to violating the critical areas ordinance. It ordered immediate eviction or fines of something like $500 day. Went by his house while he was at work and posted it. Then I taped every entry to the house with do not enter tape (it looked like a crime scene.) At the end of the 5 page document I had signed it with my name and number in small print. He called me the next day and told me he had sat there depressed for about 4 hours trying to figure out what to do before he finally read the name at the bottem of the page. I am still trying to figure out how to get the rest of the guys. It has been long enough that none of them will be expecting it. I am thinking having them served with legal papers with a bogus lawsuit. Maybe causing an accident late at night while drinking or a paternity suit from an old girlfreind from years before. Of course, I will be the attorney to contact. Any ideas or similar stories?

Go buy a bunch of crickets or something (like thousands) and go dump them down his chimney and let him try and scoop them all up before they are all over...

TP'ing is always good. But not good enough I don't think for that situation.

Put a bunch of chickens in the house.

Go offroading on their lawn if its nice.

A account traded his services for some firewood. He was headed out on vacation. The loggers who he traded with showed up with a log truck load of wood. They proceded to cut the approx. 13 cords of wood off the truck in the driveway. They stacked all 13 cords in the guys house, in the closets, kitchen cabinets, ect. The only real damage was to the carpets, which they replaced.

A good friend of mine (RIP) used to leave "creative" phone messages if I wasn't available to take his call at the office. Two classics:
!. "This is Chuck's doctor, Dr. Peter Gozinya, tell him that the tests came back positive and he better come in to start his series of penicillin shots as soon as possible."
2. "This is Chuck's attorney and tell him that if he doesn't want to show up for the paternity hearing, it's up to him but if he ends up having to pay child support for the next 20 years, don't blame me!" He insisted that the receptionist give me the message immediately as he knew I was in a board meeting with my boss and the board of directors, two of whom he knew.
Damn - I wish he hadn't been cut short too early by a brain tumor. He was a real class guy. He was an NK grad of 1965 and former ER PA in Forks and PA.

If any of your buds have any teenage daughters, call the house when you know they are gone and leave a message on the recordor saying:

"Hi this is (any name) from Planned Parenthood, and the test results came back for (daughters name). If you could call me back, that would be great, I think we need to start planning out the next several months. Thanks."