I was just topping off my boat at the gas station a few blocks from the house...I notice a car pull up and 2 young bikini clad women walk into the store. Trying hard not to stare at two sets of rather large skin pillows held in place by small amounts of cloth I notice they need some directions. The clerk asks me if I can help...long story short is we go back to my house to map quest thier address...damn I wish it only lasted longer...and like they said when they got out of thier car "I hope you dont get in trouble with the neighbors!" Sorry I wasnt ballsy enough to ask for pics...but I will say I dont think there was an once of fat on either one, and they both had beautiful racks, ages probably 18-20. What a day! I didnt catch anything that day and didnt really give a damn!

Dude you mapquested with teenage girls? How sick and perverted. I'm utterly ashamed that I even enjoyed the thought of it myself.

Oh I have to ask, did they use IE or Firefox?

This topic is worthless without pics.

DUDE! Did you make a move?

I would have busted out my indelable magic man marker and writen the directions on their hand.

That's what condoms are for.

I think I would have found a better spot to write directions . How can we use that line at a bar . how would you like to mapquest at my place? Or let's go to your place and mapquest

OK, I just want to know where you gave them directions to, now.

Fortunately, when that happens to me, and I whip out my iPhone to fire up Google Maps, it also has a 2MP camera on it.

I don't know why, but my goto pick up line of "Hey baby, wanna see my micro processor" just doesn't seem to be working......

God damn, I AM a geek.

You rookies. If your front teeth are stuck in her pubic hair there'e no need to say a word.

Problem is, I don't have flossing my teeth in mind right about then.

And yes, Parker, you are a geek! microprocessro, sheesh!

Who are you with..........sasquatch? I prefer just a little patch or nothing at all. Can you say "Brazilian Wax"?

There.

Fixed the typo for you.

ok, I was never going to admit this but here is the rest of the story...


After leaving my house I knew these girls were out to impress, but unfortuantly werent getting my vibes (have to work on that, where's merg?)

I headed to the river boat launch just down river from where these fine girls went. My fishing plans immeadiatly changed to up river knowing that there was going to be some bikini party at one of the houses over looking the river.
On the way upriver all hope was dashed as i saw no signs of life. On the reutrn trip down river though I notice on a skiff of rock in the river a bikini clad chic frolicking in the water. I immeadialty turn the boat around, drop the kicker throw out a unbaited rod and start back trolling. I sneek up to my jockey box and pull out my binos....I am sure glad they are 10X.
20 min goes by and I am now up to two chicks on the skiff, my back was getting tired of fighting the kicker with the binos glued to my face looking accross river. If these chicks new anything about fishing they would know I was a fraud by the BS "holding pattern" and the fact I kept almost running into the oppostie bank. After thorough observation I concluded these had to be the same two girls. It was time go for the gold or go home. With time running out I jet to the other side of the river about 20 ft from shore. I came in so fast they thought I was going to hit and started backing up. i drop the bucket and stop on a dime throwing a nice little wave ashore ( had to be impressive or so I thought) I smugly ask them "what happened?" they reply "HER house is just right up there and point behind them". My mind went blank WTF? Her?...all be god damn...

I then asked them if they wanted a ride "uhhh no thanks"
I was totally disappointed...my boat failed me. "Well if you ever need directions again you know where I am at" and head down river with my tail between my legs and the growing anger I just got snubbed by 2 hottie dykes...my what could have been

My what a day out on the bay,
2 bikini clad chicks needing some d*ck,
I threw all the tricks and nothing would stick,
these dykes were like kites far out of reach,
now i am at home with just me and my prick,
and GODAMMIT that makes me mad!"

Not too bad!

FIsh on...

Todd

Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes.

"There are two kinds of women in the world........those that want me, and dykes."

Roguefsr - don't feel too bad. You may have struck out but sounds to me like you at least got style points for your boat manuever on the river.

A friend's female boss asked him to come out to Lake Sutherland to take some of her friends, visiting from the eastcoast, waterskiing. He knew his boss was a lesbian, and as she'd been a catcher on the Penn State women's baseball team with the looks to match (think a young Yogi Berra), he figured the visitors would look the same.
Wrong - the two women visitors were stunning and had tiny bikinis to show off their 'assests'. At the end of the skiing session, he was sitting on the beach having a beer. As one of the bikini clad woman strolled up the dock toward him, he was checking her out. As she got up to him, she lowered her sunglasses with one finger, stared at him for a moment with a smile on her face and said "Kinda makes you crazy doesn't it. All this and I have no interest in men. Kinda like looking in the window at Baskin Robbins knowing you can't have any, isn't it."

The master move would have been to "accidentally" click on a porn site in your favorites menu instead of map-quest. Then, fumbling with the mouse "accidentally" open a move of some chicks getting throttled by a big ol' silverback. If that didn't work, nothing would.

Will you be trying that one in your future?