I was just topping off my boat at the gas station a few blocks from the house...I notice a car pull up and 2 young bikini clad women walk into the store. Trying hard not to stare at two sets of rather large skin pillows held in place by small amounts of cloth I notice they need some directions. The clerk asks me if I can help...long story short is we go back to my house to map quest thier address...damn I wish it only lasted longer...and like they said when they got out of thier car "I hope you dont get in trouble with the neighbors!" Sorry I wasnt ballsy enough to ask for pics...but I will say I dont think there was an once of fat on either one, and they both had beautiful racks, ages probably 18-20. What a day! I didnt catch anything that day and didnt really give a damn!

Dude you mapquested with teenage girls? How sick and perverted. I'm utterly ashamed that I even enjoyed the thought of it myself.

Oh I have to ask, did they use IE or Firefox?

This topic is worthless without pics.

DUDE! Did you make a move?

I would have busted out my indelable magic man marker and writen the directions on their hand.

That's what condoms are for.

I think I would have found a better spot to write directions . How can we use that line at a bar . how would you like to mapquest at my place? Or let's go to your place and mapquest

OK, I just want to know where you gave them directions to, now.

Fortunately, when that happens to me, and I whip out my iPhone to fire up Google Maps, it also has a 2MP camera on it.

I don't know why, but my goto pick up line of "Hey baby, wanna see my micro processor" just doesn't seem to be working......

God damn, I AM a geek.

You rookies. If your front teeth are stuck in her pubic hair there'e no need to say a word.

Problem is, I don't have flossing my teeth in mind right about then.

And yes, Parker, you are a geek! microprocessro, sheesh!

Who are you with..........sasquatch? I prefer just a little patch or nothing at all. Can you say "Brazilian Wax"?

There.

Fixed the typo for you.

ok, I was never going to admit this but here is the rest of the story...


After leaving my house I knew these girls were out to impress, but unfortuantly werent getting my vibes (have to work on that, where's merg?)

I headed to the river boat launch just down river from where these fine girls went. My fishing plans immeadiatly changed to up river knowing that there was going to be some bikini party at one of the houses over looking the river.
On the way upriver all hope was dashed as i saw no signs of life. On the reutrn trip down river though I notice on a skiff of rock in the river a bikini clad chic frolicking in the water. I immeadialty turn the boat around, drop the kicker throw out a unbaited rod and start back trolling. I sneek up to my jockey box and pull out my binos....I am sure glad they are 10X.
20 min goes by and I am now up to two chicks on the skiff, my back was getting tired of fighting the kicker with the binos glued to my face looking accross river. If these chicks new anything about fishing they would know I was a fraud by the BS "holding pattern" and the fact I kept almost running into the oppostie bank. After thorough observation I concluded these had to be the same two girls. It was time go for the gold or go home. With time running out I jet to the other side of the river about 20 ft from shore. I came in so fast they thought I was going to hit and started backing up. i drop the bucket and stop on a dime throwing a nice little wave ashore ( had to be impressive or so I thought) I smugly ask them "what happened?" they reply "HER house is just right up there and point behind them". My mind went blank WTF? Her?...all be god damn...

I then asked them if they wanted a ride "uhhh no thanks"
I was totally disappointed...my boat failed me. "Well if you ever need directions again you know where I am at" and head down river with my tail between my legs and the growing anger I just got snubbed by 2 hottie dykes...my what could have been

My what a day out on the bay,
2 bikini clad chicks needing some d*ck,
I threw all the tricks and nothing would stick,
these dykes were like kites far out of reach,
now i am at home with just me and my prick,
and GODAMMIT that makes me mad!"

Not too bad!

FIsh on...

Todd

Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes.

"There are two kinds of women in the world........those that want me, and dykes."

Roguefsr - don't feel too bad. You may have struck out but sounds to me like you at least got style points for your boat manuever on the river.

A friend's female boss asked him to come out to Lake Sutherland to take some of her friends, visiting from the eastcoast, waterskiing. He knew his boss was a lesbian, and as she'd been a catcher on the Penn State women's baseball team with the looks to match (think a young Yogi Berra), he figured the visitors would look the same.
Wrong - the two women visitors were stunning and had tiny bikinis to show off their 'assests'. At the end of the skiing session, he was sitting on the beach having a beer. As one of the bikini clad woman strolled up the dock toward him, he was checking her out. As she got up to him, she lowered her sunglasses with one finger, stared at him for a moment with a smile on her face and said "Kinda makes you crazy doesn't it. All this and I have no interest in men. Kinda like looking in the window at Baskin Robbins knowing you can't have any, isn't it."

The master move would have been to "accidentally" click on a porn site in your favorites menu instead of map-quest. Then, fumbling with the mouse "accidentally" open a move of some chicks getting throttled by a big ol' silverback. If that didn't work, nothing would.

Will you be trying that one in your future?

As soon as I get accosted by two bikini clad hotties looking for directions. Unfortunately, it's the clueless dudes that get all the breaks.

if I had thought for one moment that I could have had these chicks remove thier tops and then take photo proof I would have....but something was up with these two...they were more interested in where they were going then how they got there.

You can stop right there. We all know that anyone with an iPhone wouldn't have any interest in doing anything with a women other than shopping.

...or maybe frosting each other's hair.

Fish on...

Todd

Kind of reminds me of the joke where the guy is sitting in a bar watching this beautiful young woman in the hopes that he would be noticed. This older woman sitting between him and the younger woman asks him if he would like to smell the young woman's "kitty". The guy says yea sure and then the older woman burps in his face.

years ago in yakima i was working a jazz & brew festiville. manning the jockey box i had a repeat visit by two stunning hotties. one a blonde the other a brunnette. say college age. the brunnette was my pick! not letting a oppertunity slip i went for a opening. knowing that all women just love to hear anything that is very good about themselves. i asked my i give you a compliment? she said why yes, sweetly. your hair is is done up very beautifull today. as i'm pouring thier hefewiezens the blonde turns the brunnette to herself and puts a full blown lip lock french kiss on her and begins to grab her breasts!!! HOLY SMOKES!!! i over poured the beer! they grabbed thier two hefes', the blonde pulled her by the arm and looked back at me and said " she's mine" and off they went.

the story here is this, it doesn't matter how hott the dykes look, they prefer the same teams equipment. sad i know, but thats the story.

Cant sell a dog to woman that likes cats.

You know how you tell if they're twins? They lick alike

I like the one with the big [censored]

Got milk

Jeez I leave town for a few days the dark side perks up.

The one on the right, no the one second from...I just can't pick!

I'd hit all six at the same time.

Ya do gotta be careful these days!

The Kinks had it right so many years ago...a "warning" of sorts to us young studs of the day to always make sure with the "Mick Dundee Beaver Check"

I met her in a club down in old Soho
Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry-cola
See-oh-el-aye cola
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola
El-oh-el-aye Lola la-la-la-la Lola


Mike

Must be one of mergs buddies

Speaking of bikini's, since I'm now single again and will be for the rest of my life, I think I'll take up yoga. Especially if the fellow students look like this.
http://www.break.com/index/why-i-want-to-try-yogo.html

Funny how I'm not seeing anything like this when I work out at my local Bally's Fitness Center.
Enjoy,
Brian

You might as well do it naked because your shorts won't be hiding a damn thing.

stonedfish....thank you .

heh heh............Brian is single again...........heh heh.................

Mingo,
.......and enjoying it......
A leopard doesn't change it's spots. Trying to change to make the other half happy just doesn't work. Be who you are.
Time to fish!
Brian

I try to get to 3 or 4 Yoga classes per week. Went to a noon class today. Been practicing Yoga for 10 years now. I do Yoga primarily because it helps me in a holistic way, to maintain good mind and body health. There is a chance ( still awaiting a reply to my application ) that I will be attending a 2 week intensive teacher training certification program next month in Eastern Washington, upon my return from Puerto Rico. Keeping my finger crossed!

Gotta love those Downward facing dogs.

Namaste'