PLEASE READ!

Thank goodness there's a name

for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better

even though I have it!!

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car

and decide it needs washing.


As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail

before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table,
put the junk mail in the garbage can

under the table,
and notice that the can is full.

So I decide to put the bills back on the table & take out the garbage first.

But then I think,

since I'm going to be near the mailbox

when I take out the garbage anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.
My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
so I go inside the house to my desk,

where I find the can of Pepsi

I'd been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,
but first I need to push the Pepsi aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.
The Pepsi is getting warm.

I decide to put it in the refrigerator

to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,
a vase of flowers on the counter

catches my eye.

They need water.
I put the Pepsi on the counter and
discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.


I decide I better put them back

on my desk,
but first I'm going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the counter,
fill a container with water

and suddenly spot the TV remote;
someone had left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight

when we go to watch TV,
I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember

that it's on the kitchen table,
so I decide to put it back in the den

where it belongs.

But first I'll water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers.
Quite a bit of it spills on the floor.
So, I set the remote back on the table,
get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of
Pepsi sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check

in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what

I did with the car keys.


Then, when I try to figure out

why nothing got done,
I'm really baffled because I know

I was busy all damn day,
and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail.....